I've been into feet since I first saw Popeye tickle Olive. However, until recently telling someone what I just told you meant instant castration. Some people just don't get it. Like my wife. Jeez. Probably lots of frustrated guys out there like me. She's got nice feet, but...duh? There's a misconception about someone with a foot fetish. Fetish is generally defined as "worship." That's stretching it just a bit. We don't "worship" feet. (However no one seems to have a problem with the line: "I worship the ground that you walk on). In the latter context, the word "worship" might be appropriate. We're not a bunch of guys waiting to jump on a giant spaceship shaped like a foot.

I love hamburgers but I don't worship them. Cheeseburgers are a different story.

For the ladies: Trust me. If your guy is "into feet," give him the benefit of the doubt and go along with him when he wants to tickle you or play little games or video your feet or role play. How much harm can come from someone tickling your feet? If my wife wanted me to stand on my head in the middle of the room and sing the "Star Spangled Banner" to help get her motor running, I'd be singing right now and taking voice lessons tomorrow.

And "HELP get the motor running" is a key word. Most of us don't have to have a foot in our mouth to have sex. The "normal" route is fine. Feet just add spice once in awhile. Warning: Once you open up about it and let him play footsie before sex, he's likely to want it a lot at least for awhile. It may be some time before he gets back to "normal."

I had this really cool professor in college, Dr. James McCary, who wrote the book "Human Sexuality." (Author goes to look for book, can't find it). Well anyway, one of the lines reads something like: "If a man were to tickle the soles of his wife's feet prior to each act of coitus that woman might very well come to associate foot tickling with the pleasurable act of sex." In other words she might eventually like it as she associates it with THE ACT. "However, if the woman were to later remarry, her (new) husband might find the act of foot tickling quite abnormal." That's not a direct quote, but the idea is there.

I learned early on during those college days that anything that two consenting adults do in the privacy of their own homes is allright with me. It's none of my business unless they ask my opinion which would be: "Hey, whatever quacks your duck."

Then there's also the misconception that a guy who is into feet is some sort of pervert. Is a guy who is into breasts a pervert? Or asses? Or legs? "I'm a leg man." "I'm a t---y man myself." The bottom line is, who cares? As long as the guy doesn't go around yanking off women's shoes, getting in a little tickle, and running. But those are the ones that we all read about. Unfortunate. But not representative of the norm anymore than ear biting is of boxing.

Ladies, please don't get on your husband or boyfriend's case about his "little thing with feet." Maybe you don't understand it. That's okay. I don't understand how this computer works but you're reading this.

"But of all things...feet?" Maybe you don't understand that anymore than he understands why you (or maybe not you...just some women) can take so long to get to the point. My wife goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on to the until I look at the ceiling then at the floor then at her then at the dog then at pictures on the refridgerator before finally asking her: "Will you please get to the bottom line on this deal or what!!!?"

QUESTION: Whatever got the guy turned onto feet in the first place? There's no definitive answer to that one. Probably a pleasant childhood experience that he's long since forgotten. But asking that question is like having the fire department arrive while your house is burning down and wanting to know what started the fire. Who cares what started it! Let's put it out! Then if we want to we can investigate its origin. With feet, it doesn't really matter what started the fire. If he's got a thing for feet it's not going to go away. Concentrate on the fire and not in what started it before the house burns down.

Are you saying that he might seek another woman? Nope. But his life (and quite possibly yours) would be just one heck of a lot more pleasant if you indulged him in this little ticklish matter. It only tickles. It doesn't hurt. It's not like he's asking you to set your hair on fire everytime you have sex. He just wants to play with your feet.

QUESTION: What about bondage? Personally, I wouldn't like the idea of being tied up. Not by my wife. Not by anyone. But they make these little pink handcuffs that have a release button on them so that you are "bound" and then again you're not. It's Pretent Time. You release 'em when you want to. I might even consider that. He's probably not into bondage anyway. He'd probably be content merely holding your feet so that it's pretend-you-can't-get-away time. Why does that turn him on? Hell if I know, but it probably does. Does for me anyway.

It's like looking for a new car. Ever notice that when you're looking for cars or houses or whatever...it seems like they're everywhere? Same thing here. A scene in a movie that you might just pass up might send him into "wishful" orbit. Like a movie our boy rented: "Robocop II." There's a delicious foot tickling scene in that movie that was put there for a reason. Wonder why? Maybe, just maybe because they too have a thing for feet. Then, maybe not. But there are tons of movies and tv commercials and song lyrics that use feet as a theme.

Remember the oldie from the '60's, "Midnight Confessions?" Listen to the first line or so of that #1 song. "The sound of your footsteps telling me that your near. Your soft hand on my arch in bed brings out a feeling that no one can hear..." IT'S THERE IF YOU LOOK FOR IT.

Tomorrow morning...wake him up by tickling his feet. Or placing yours in his face. Play with his nose with your toes. Watch what happens. Whatever it is...I can guarantee...IT WILL BE GOOD.

Later.